Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Medieval Times Atlanta Launches a New Show, and It's Awesome!

Hear ye, hear ye, you are hereby invited to feast you eyes on the eight things you need to know about Medieval Times, that OTP bastion of jousting and feasting.

  • Upon entering you get to take a picture with one of the Medieval folk. We got ours with the king, so I think that makes us a BFD in this kingdom.

The King and a young subject
  • You get a paper crown, which you of course will wear proudly the entire time you are at     Medieval Times. The color of your crown proclaims to one and all which knight you are sworn to support. If I had my druthers, I'd take Robb Stark.

The Red and Yellow Knight plays to his fans
  • You will be lead into an impressively huge arena, in which you will cheer your heart out for your knight and boo like a maniac at your enemy knights. The experience works best if you throw yourself into the lusty shouting. This is not an experience for the cynical.

Not Pictured: Falconry
  • You will enjoy Medieval Times' new show, replete with  horsemanship, jousting, and even falconry. The jousting will impress the bejesus out of you because you'll wonder just how do these knights avoid getting hurt?

  • If you are as lucky as me, your knight will win bringing honor to your corner of the kingdom. Red and yellow knight 4 eva!
The Red and Yellow Knight takes out the trash!
  • You will admire the commitment of the denizens of Medieval Times never break character with a surprising number of Lawrenceville Kingdom residents, including our enthusiastic waiter, speaking with a British accent. The court appears to be Spanish based on their names (King Carlos, et al), but like all good foreign set American movies, English accents are the signal that you are foreign or old timey. The knights (save the clearly less committed Blue Knight) even grew out their lustrous locks to a length that would make Prince Valiant proud.

They've even got a painter.  Medieval Times doesn't kid around!

  • No one leaves hungry. The food is plentiful and to be eaten only with your hands. Tomato soup, half a ginormous chicken, spareribs, potatoes and a dessert are enough to leave even Henry VII feeling stuffed. Do not go expecting haute cuisine. This is good ol' fashioned feeding the masses kind of food. My father, who never met a plate he couldn't clean, announced, "this food is great." 

This is about as close to violence as the show comes. It's kid-safe but still action-packed.

  • Your little ones will love it. Medieval Times is clearly a great special night out for families with no violence too realistic, no joke too bawdy for wee sensibilities. 

  • Genius business idea: once a month, Medieval Times should have an adults only night at which the jokes are racier and the fighting quite a bit bloodier. With the popularity of Game of Thrones, how could this not be totally awesome?!

The unstoppable Red and Yellow Knight takes on two enemies!

  • You will have a damn fine time. Even without kids, I had a blast throwing myself into the Medieval mileu. I donned my crown, poured my heart into cheering on my knight and dug in to dinner with my bear hands. What's not to love?

    • Want to experience the new show for yourself? Enjoy this limited time offer for $39.95 for adults and $24.95 for children

    Take this fine suit home for only $5,800!



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